Genesis, Exodus, NUMBERS, Deuteronomy…

I’m so pleased to have my friend, and funny lady, Joan Oliver Emmer as a guest blogger today! Joan’s website, Body of Work is definitely one of my favorites. Enjoy her love / hate relationship with logins on my site, then I’d be tickled if you use the link above to come over to her site and get my take on Groundhog Day. Enjoy!

It has taken me nearly eight months of applying for unemployment insurance online to be able to remember the four digit code that I must pair with my social security number  to collect benefits.  It’s not a complicated series of numbers, but it’s one of approximately 127 passwords and codes that I need to  remember every day in order to be able to manage my online life.  Which is essentially the totality of my life these days.

Each day I wake up and pray that I will remember my passwords.  It would make sense, I tell myself EVERY SINGLE DAY as I struggle with messages that lock me out of my online bank accounts, Facebook, and access to my medical benefits (how will I ever treat that dowager’s hump?),  to write down all of my passwords.  I tried this once, but as you might have guessed –ba da bump! – I couldn’t remember where I left the little notebook in which I jotted down my passwords.   Or why I was even looking for it.

It’s a good thing that prospective employers don’t know that I can’t remember a series of four simple, consecutive, even numbers.  It would confirm their suspicions that there are younger models out there who don’t need to run to the ladies room every 15 minutes or jack up their insurance costs with fun stuff like endoscopies and hernia repair operations.

I am taking a social work course for which the entire class had to meet last Thursday evening to watch a two hour film.  The median age of students in the social work program is 37 –not young by the standards of most post-secondary courses of study, but way younger than I am.  This morning (Monday), the professor emailed us a follow-up assignment to complete, asking us to reiterate the main points of the film, the director’s point of view and the overall takeaway.  Only four days later and I couldn’t remember anything about the film.   And it’s not like I can look up the synopsis of a film called “Race – the Power of an Illusion” on Rottentomatoes.com

My husband has a very cool option on his own computer, one which I would love to have for every online site I access.  Rather than inputting a password, he has the option of “swiping an enrolled finger.”

I don’t know how you “enroll a finger” or whether “swiping” one can get you thrown in jail, but laughing at this term is enough to make me forget all my troubles – and all of my remaining passwords – every time.

13 thoughts on “Genesis, Exodus, NUMBERS, Deuteronomy…

  1. Funny post! And for some of us (ok, me) it’s so close to the truth it’s not funny. It was like you were writing about me (yea, everything’s about me. I think they have a name for that condition, too) with the unemployment online and the endless password and the endoscopy, etc. I’m right there with ya, lady.
    Enjoyed your post. Will be checking out your site as well.

    Terri

    • I wonder if they give colonoscopies AT the unemployment office. Sure would save time…..I was there on Monday morning and was kind of pissed to find out they didn’t have wireless Internet.

  2. I’m always forgetting my passwords. I finally created a file for them. Now, if I just don’t forget how to get into that file…..

    • Why don’t you leave your password file with me, Norma, for safe keeping? And please indicate which one is your bank account pw.

  3. I’m pretty good with remembering numbers…I can remember my Social Insurance Number which is 9 digits long, and I can remember my debit card number which is 16 digits long…yet, I barely remember what I had for supper last night…go figure…

  4. I have a hard time remembering numbers past a nanosecond. Problem is, my last job was in trust accounting for a retirement fund administration firm. It amazes me when people memorize the phone extensions of everyone in the office, can recite their social security number in three languages, or remember the address of the doctor’s office two weeks after looking it up.

    I cringe every time a new website asks me to create a password. I keep thinking, “I should write this down” but I’m no better about that than I am at remembering to bring a grocery list to the store.

    • It never fails that I bring a grocery list to the store and then lose it somewhere between the house and the door of the market. NEVER, EVER fails.

  5. My bank account password? Well, go to any bank in Zurich, tell them your name is Karl-Heinz and give them the following number 55325678997453. Either they’ll look at you funny or hand over thirty million dollars that’s been sitting there for seventy years.

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