I must have some kind of “not okay” demeanor, because my friends often feel compelled to ask “what’s wrong?” My mind will immediately race through all the possibilities. Well, my bananas are overripe, my stretched-out underwear has taken up permanent residence in my butt-crack, and when the hell are they going to let Josh drive the boat on Deadliest Catch?
I am a quiet sort of person, and people take that to mean that I’m thinking serious thoughts, when I’m actually wondering if I should get the hand soap with honey and cocoa butter, or the aloe vera. In the end I just choose the white soap because it goes better with my fake marble counter tops.
I’m at the age now where I really should be examining my accomplishments in life. What have I contributed to society? What kind of legacy will I leave after I’m gone? Should I have flossed more often as a child? I tend to compare myself to the greats like Stephen Hawking and Dave Barry, and I consistently come up short.
This would certainly give me good cause to look un-okay, but as it happens, I tend to set the bar kind of low. My bills are paid and the dog hasn’t barfed on the carpet today. I’ll put that in the win column. I’m also good at letting things go. When the server at Wendy’s puts too much chocolate syrup in my milkshake, I call him an idiot (behind his back) and that’s the end of it.
So when people ask, I have to conclude that, yes, I really am okay. If I could find underwear that fit right, I would be freakin’ awesome.
Well, thank goodness. That answers my question. I don’t have anything ask now. Oh wait! Which Wendy’s is that? I like extra syrup in my milk shake!
Hugs, my friend. Glad you’re ok. I had no doubt. I firmly believe that a person with a good sense of humor (YOU) can pretty much make it through anything.
Terri
P.S. Let me know when you find the right underwear. I’m going to worry about you until you solve that, you know.
You can have MY underwear. It’s the least I can do for you.
Karla–you, quiet? I would never have believed it if I’d heard it from anyone but you.
That reminds me…. Note to self: Buy underwear.
I got one word for you – *thong* 🙂 Love ya Auntie!
When the scrap of fabric disappears between the butt cheeks, it’s time for size extra large granny panties.
I’ve needed new underwear for ages…but I never remember to buy the damn things.
I am so glad that YOU are all right. But, if you have to worry about the amount of syrup in your milkshake, then I think you’re doing ok…
Dave Barry’s one of the greats?
You can never have too much syrup in your shakes.
I’ve noticed that the older I get, the lower my expectations are for almost everything in life …
Hi, this is Mom. We are at Karrin’s this weekend for the wedding. Guess what? I just bought new underwear and it isn’t white! (Oh my gosh. I never thought I would be saying this out loud and in public!) But at my age, if it fits its mine!
What have you contributed to society? You’ve made people laugh which I think is very important! We could all use some humor in our lives.
I applaud your search for comfortable underware. When I hit a certain age, I decided life was hard enough without having to wear uncomfortable panites. So, I went granny panty. Oh yeah, girlfriend, I’ve been much less crabby. It was my getting older Quirk Out: Crazy Things Women Do to Stay Sane: http://quirkout.com/2010/06/the-thong-is-all-wrong-wrong-wrong-wrong/