My life of crime

One of the unsung heroes of the police department is the meter maid. They save the loading zones of the world from the riff-raff who would take advantage of the system. My most recent brush with the law involved parking between two “No Parking” signs near the beach at Sullivan’s Island. I trudged back to the car just in time to find the local gendarme writing up the ticket.

I briefly considered leading him on a high speed chase through downtown Sullivan’s Island (motto: we have Dippin’ Dots). With my luck, his golf cart would have been the Crown Vic of all golf carts, able to max out at 20 miles per hour, and perform a pit maneuver that would scratch the paint on the fender of my new Jeep.

As I value my paint job, and wanted to avoid the media circus that would have been a trip to traffic court, I decided to bite the bullet, sign the ticket, and go to the courthouse (open every other Wednesday) to pay my ten dollar fine. I managed to get away before the news crew showed up. Few people are able to rock the coat-over-the-head look.

Have you ever gotten away with the perfect traffic crime, or been in a gas station restroom clean enough to eat off the floor? Neither have I. Have you ever discovered a diarrhea waterfall coming out of the baby’s car seat when you’re in the middle of nowhere? Check. My Funny books is looking for side-splitting stories / activities / poems, etc. about road trips. I’m attempting to make a road kill crossword puzzle for the book. Other activities may involve quizzes, silly sing-alongs, or car games.

This is a great opportunity to get your work published, get some free publicity, and build your writing platform. Go to for submission guidelines. We’re looking forward to hearing from you.

6 thoughts on “My life of crime

  1. I don’t have to worry much about meter maids in Vegas. I use valet parking everywhere I go. Seriously. They have valet parking for everywhere, even the airport. It’s crazy. Probably because everyone has a few slot machines in their establishments to bulk up their bottom-line.
    They probably have meter-maids downtown, but I’m allergic to traffic and drunk tourists, so I avoid that area at all costs.
    FUNNY post!
    Have a good weekend, my friend.

    • They do push the free drinks in Vegas. I’m sure they more than make up for it in bad gambling choices.

  2. Doesn’t sound like lovely Rita to me. There was nothing else you could do with such a formidable nemesis. 🙂

    • If I’d run for it, he’d probably have had a donut-induced heart attack trying to run me down.

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