Spare the rod and prevent mood disorders

I grew up in a simpler time when parents could smack the snot out of you with impunity. My mom once told me that she preferred a wooden spoon for spankings because it stung real good without leaving a mark. Most muggings are not thought out so well.

In a recent video gone viral, a stepfather is seen spanking a child because he dropped a ball while playing catch. This spawned a backlash of public outrage from the same parents who get ejected from the little league game for publicly berating their athletically challenged offspring.

While dropping a ball is a crappy reason for hitting your child, I can think of dozens of good reasons for a good swat to the tooshie.

You hear people say, “Never strike your child in anger.” While I agree that you should probably extinguish the cat’s tail before ripping the matches out of Junior’s hand and putting him over your knee, it seems a little cold-hearted to wait two weeks till your blood pressure returns to normal before punishing the little pyromaniac.

New studies have shown that spankings can cause mood disorders in adults. Old studies have shown that spankings can cause good behavior in kids. Guess which one I choose.

I recently sat next to a family while their children were having a food fight in the Golden Corral. The parents ignored the lovable antics. If I’m picking mashed potatoes out of my hair, I promise you that I’ll be first in line to put your child into therapy.

Another video showed a bus monitor enduring poking and horrible verbal abuse from her young charges. Not one parent made their children apologize when they found out. My kid would have his backside burning as he walked to school.

Choose your punishments carefully, and the few times you have to resort to spankings will make a bigger impression … on their butts.

8 thoughts on “Spare the rod and prevent mood disorders

  1. All I could think of when I saw that video of the woman on the bus getting ridiculed by little heathens was “I’m sure glad my kids weren’t like that.” And then, for a split second, “or have that just not ever been caught?” entered my head. Then it went away in a flash. No, I choose to believe they were little angels. And they were especially angelic within a few days after a spanking. Oh Mommy Dearest, yes I did!

    • I was generally able to come up with inventive punishments, but there were those times when a little pain went a long way.

  2. My parents never spanked me. Dad said I didn’t need it–until I was too old to spank.

    I never spanked Collin–but I never needed to. He was an unbelievably good kid. The one and only time he ever threw a tantrum–in Target, in front of God and everybody (figures)–I gave him a little swat on the butt. I’ll never forget the look on his face. He really was not expecting it.

    But I have seen kids so out of control that waterboarding seems a fitting punishment.

    • You were pretty fortunate. I normally reserved spankings for things like toddlers running into the street or hiding under the clothes racks in the department store.

  3. I didn’t get spanked often- I think it’s something best sparingly used.

    Dropping a ball is a pretty stupid reason to do that… but of course, lots of people, it seems, are pretty stupid.

    • I wish there was a battery of tests before one can reproduce. Parenting is tough, but children need reasonable discipline. Too bad common sense isn’t that common.

  4. For me, I got the fly swatter once on my backside, and it was for a really stupid reason, and one that wasn’t even my fault. What I would have endured more of would have been the spankings…at least the anger was over and done with…what I hated was later on in my teen and YA years, the dreaded lectures…

    • Mom had the wooden spoon, Dad just had to say he was disappointed and I’d be in tears.

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