Welcome to the I <3 Books Blog Hop! This is my first time participating in a blog hop, so we’ll muddle through it together, have some fun along the way, meet some new authors, and maybe win some prizes. (Please let there be a pony).
For those of you unfamiliar with my blog, I write about the trials and absurdities of getting older, one of which is love. Pop a few Valentine chocolates, pull up a rocking chair, and enjoy this excerpt from my upcoming humor book, I Never Drove a Bulldozer / There’s a Hole in my Bucket List.
I’ll see you in August
Time once again for my annual lament at the passing of a great American pastime. I’m sad to see the football season winding down to an end for another year. This is going to put a major crimp in my sex life.
Every Sunday, my husband and I celebrate naked football day. We like to have the game going while we scrump like bunnies, because at our age, it helps to hear the crowd cheering us on. It’s nice to know that the defensive players are also exhausted by the third drive and sucking wind. Of course, we never make it to a third drive.
Two years ago after the Super Bowl, we were desperate to have some kind of background noise from the TV, so we randomly chose a channel. Up came Norm Abrams on The New Yankee Workshop. Norm got his television start as a carpenter on This Old House, an old favorite of mine.
On this occasion, Norm was building a chest, and explaining how to put together the drawers. I heard snatches as we struggled for inspiration. “Notice the dovetailing …” I blushed.
He was relentless. “Now we’re going to take the router … tongue in groove …” Okay, that’s it. I was officially weirded-out. We lost our place, and were too embarrassed to even snuggle. I did the walk of shame into the bathroom to get dressed.
In February, we start naked NASCAR. I get a little thrill when I hear, “Gentlemen, start your engines.” On top of the cheering, we get to hear the thunder of unlimited horse-power. My only stipulations are: no drafting, and no bump and run.
Be sure to visit the other great blogs in the I *heart* Books blog hop using the link below.
your post cracked me up Karla! i might just try this someday.
Just remember the “no cleats” rule.
I’m stuck on naked football….
I’m all about the romance for Valentine’s Day.
Oh my gosh, this post had me rolling! It was great. Thanks for stopping by my blog. Have a great Valentines Day!
You too, Tricia. Thanks for stopping by.
Ha ha! What a funny excerpt! The ‘tongue in groove” had me literally laughing out loud. Hubby used to watch This Old House, so I can even hear the guy’s voice in my head. ha ha!!
Thanks so much for joining the blog hop! For a ‘first timer” you did wonderful!
Too bad I’m too late like always. Keep up the touch downs and have fun!
I’d settle for a field goal.
omg, so funny. I loved reading this piece.
😀 That really made me laugh!! Have a great Valentines day!!
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The big question is whether or not you can engage in naked hockey.
You’d definitely have to take into account the shrinkage factor.
I’m seriously considering watching sports again, if these are the fringe benefits. A cracking read. Thanks.
I loved this story when I first read it and I loved it again! I’m glad there were no flags on the play! Can you imagine being off sides or roughing the passer and having to lose yardage? You get nowhere fast!
Hee hee. Not likely to be roughing the passer, but off sides I could believe.
I’m not sure what a blog hop is, and I don’t like football. But naked anything is better than not-naked anything!