How about those Lakers?

As I write this, my head is stuck in the down position. While that’s not a problem for working at the computer or overhauling the engine of a classic ’54 Thunderbird (robin’s egg blue), it scores no points for doing…well, anything else. Also complicating the issue is that I don’t own a classic T-bird.

Current view

For days now, I’ve been unable to turn my head to the left, but this down thing took me by surprise. The disadvantages are that I’m reminded constantly that my legs need shaving, and I am painfully aware when the dog is sniffing my crotch.

Bad doggy!

As long as I’m in the position anyway, I used this opportunity to surf through WebMD: the source for many a hypochondriac’s nightmares. Possible causes for neck stiffness range from ankylosing spondylitis to West Nile virus. Just great! I hate when that happens!

After many ouchy attempts, I’ve now managed to straighten my head up.

Normally, cocking the head is reserved for listening intently or appearing inquisitive. If I was at a Presidential press conference, I could just be pretending that I’m interested in your petty global warming questions, while I’m really wondering if the Lakers can pull off a winning season.

I could always pass it off as being hard of hearing. It would be fun asking the friendly Wal-Mart associate where the condoms are located. People would wonder why he’s shouting in my face, “Do you want the lubricated, or ribbed for her pleasure?”

When dogs cock their heads, people just say, “Awww” and think that it is cute. I do rather like the taste of Milk Bones. Besides, I needed an excuse to include this picture. It’s too adorable to pass up.

But I digress.

As soon as I finish this, I’m waking up my husband so he can run me to the daytime clinic for some muscle relaxants. I’ll pull out my heating pad that smells funky. It also looks like the cat hacked a hairball on it.

Never fear, dear readers. This too shall pass, but I am at that age where whining about your aches and pains is practically mandatory. I wouldn’t want to get my AARP card revoked for undue stoicism. Just be aware that if it looks like I’m listening to you intently, I’m probably thinking about the Lakers.

13 thoughts on “How about those Lakers?

  1. I had this happen once. My doc told me not to worry, just take three Advil every six hours and put heat on my neck.

    Consider yourself lucky that when you look down, you can actually SEE your feet, girl!

  2. I see you, Sister, and I raise you a sharp pain from my lower back, down my left leg to my toes. Happens when I move, sit, stand, breath. Ok enough about me and you. We are much too young to be talking this shit. So cock your head the other way and let’s talk basketball. (Lakers are basketball, right?)

    Hope your kinks (well the UNfun ones anyway) go away soon!


  3. Hey, maybe it’s that diet resolution coming back to haunt you? You’re stuck in a permanent looking down at the scale view. (with a slight twist). I agree with Norma about being about to see your feet.

  4. You mentioned in a previous post about a Doberman and that one pic looks like a Dobbie with kind of a shorter than normal muzzle (could be the camera angle) and I see the dog didn’t have it ears cut and propped-up.

    I had a sweet Dobbie and didn’t mutilate her ears…

    She got ripped off…

    Had bad dreams for years 🙁

    • They’re awful good dogs. I can’t imagine what you went through. Colt follows me everywhere, and will hide behind my legs at any sign of danger (like helium balloons). He doesn’t seem to realize that he’s way too big to effectively hide.

  5. I’ll see your neck pain and raise you a pain in my ass…sciatica, to be exact. I’ve also had that dreaded neck pain before, only I couldn’t move my neck in either direction. I tried everything, but nothing worked. It wasn’t until my husband got the job he has now, and was making decent money, that my pain went away. Stress, I guess…

    Now, I have flat feet, pains in the right side of my ass, and also, I can’t see my feet…we are a mess, aren’t we…

  6. We know what’s on that heating pad. Same as ours: blood, sweat and ear wax. The latter of which be discussed in depth in our next blog post. Stay tuned – don’t turn that head! Oops, “sensitivity” is not our middle name.

    • It’s been years since I’ve heard of a neck cold. I can’t talk tho, I’m currently suffering through a bout of the stomach flu.

  7. Can you imagine if you had died from the neck injury?? The last photo you would’ve taken would have been of a dog sniffing your crotch. At least it would’ve been for good reason and well documented.

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